The joy of inessentials

I can't tell you how much I am not a regular delivery recipient. Downstairs (I am the Upstairs in this flat conversion) seem to be completely fuelled by deliveries, even outside lockdown, and I judge them for it. The takeaway recycling alone is a source of infinite internal monologuing, of a kind I'd better not get into further for its utter pettiness. I, on the other hand, am always out and about. My job and my hobbies combine to mean I am never at home for a delivery.

Ahahaha you can see where this is going. Now I'm home. *Now* delivery would be amazingly helpful and viable. Can I get anyone to deliver, including to my vulnerable parents? Can I heck as like.

Except, this week, I actually have. I got a fruit delivery sent to my folks which has temporarily sated their cravings (my mum's only uncle actually died of fruit addiction**, and I am resigned to this being normal to her genetics). They then got a veg box + essentials delivery from the firm which delivered last week, except I did not order this one and it's not on my account and nobody knows where it came from and oh god now they have far, far too much fresh food, cue hysterical laughter all round. The neighbours are helping out, with a slightly baffled sense they should be making sure my parents have enough in These Difficult Times rather than taking away food from 80somethings. Anyway.

Meanwhile, a sign of These Difficult Times which has shaken me slightly, despite me temporarily having Prime, Amazon has said it'll deliver my folks some printer ink when it's ready. Sometime in May, prolly. Oh.

My working arrangements at the moment are a tad cramped, but there is always room for tea

Getting stuff delivered directly to me has not been a priority while trying to sort all this out for the parents. I can fetch food for myself, it is not a problem, and given that there's a fair bit I still can't get delivered over to them, I would be in supermarkets anyway. What was until today more of a preoccupation was laundry - I don't have a washing machine and my usual launderette has closed (their decision, but fair enough). So today I waited for one of the fancy laundry apps to send a guy to take away my laundry, and that went fine. I will find out tomorrow evening whether that was a good idea, or if I've paid £20 (I know, oh god the £££ this is the minimum amount, I have to find a better option) to never see my pants again. Hey ho.

I was listening out for the laundry guy but I was also listening out for a much funner delivery. Two weeks ago, as things were locking down, I got an email from Betty's, and I thought Ooooh. But clearly, that wasn't essential food. I twote, longingly, about it. And a distinguished retired colleague/longterm Betty's afficionado replied: support them if you can. They're doing right by their staff. So I'm afraid I put an order in. Including some Easter stuff, hence the delayed delivery till now.

It's so, so, so nice to see something that isn't part of a meal plan, or a schedule. Something daft. I've not been baking, unlike many of you, cos I don't have anyone to eat the stuff and can't afford to calorie up too much further. So it has been a rather rigorously vegetable-based time, if we ignore the cocktail situation. Occasional millet for variety. Tomorrow? Tomorrow's breakfast will be a slice or two of GIANT hot cross bun. It will be fabulous. Also, as in the picture above, my tea break today featured hot cross bun macaroons. And now I have something to schlep to my parents which doesn't have to fit in the fridge and is delicious rather than healthful. Lavish and glorious scenes.

Look. At. That. Bun. (Quality Street tin for scale)

But that's not all. How amazing are other people? I got a slightly trailed but completely unexpectedly brilliant delivery from Anne-Marie yesterday - a bottle of bourbon, lack of which came up in #ConfinedCocktails last week. It arrived during a videoconference, luckily not a v serious one, so everyone got to see me returning from the door with a box clearly containing booze. I was so happy.

And today? Today I got some sage from that Katie, which arrived just in time to liven up my final bowl of butternut sludge (last weekend's veg roasting is finally done). And I got sent Easter chocolates. I've no idea who by, but given it's someone who has my mobile no and address the field is fairly small. It's like Christmas, but better because I had absolutely no clue there would suddenly be All The Fun Things arriving today. Thank you, mystery benefactor, and named generous folk alike.

Chocolate and booze. All the good things.

Not all days are going to be this good. I feel a bit bad about such unexpected frivolity amid this otherwise extremely not good situation. But my god, it's cheering. Betty's has run out of safe delivery capacity before Easter, but their newsletter today says: "But we’re happy to say that we’re busily restocking and can deliver after 15th April. This includes Easter eggs – with the world so upside-down right now, eating Easter eggs for the whole of April feels entirely acceptable." 

It's official. Go Easter eggs. Go Betty's. Go small, frivolous, happymaking things that can safely be delivered and give a sense that something may survive in the wreckage after all this. And go friends. Thank you.





**Dysentry. Java. 1905. Fruitarianism-inspired emigration. Do. Not. Ask.