There can be only one?

The Curator and I generally get along famously. But there is one conflict in our household that tends to crop up in this lovely springish time -- namely, the identity of The One True Asparagus.

Y'see, I spent a significant chunk of my childhood weekends in the asparagus capital of the world, where my parents would buy 20 pounds of (proper) green asparagus at a go, in paper bags, from a card table in the farmer's front yard, manned probably by one of the farmer's kids (now I am both hungry and woefully nostalgic). But the Curator is ein Deutscher, and in Germany asparagus is white (because it is continually re-buried until it's hoicked out the ground with a knife).

Luckily for us, this is an easily-solved problem, because we just buy both! And even more luckily for me, he introduced me to the wonders of Spargelzeit. Restaurants in Germany often have special asparagus menus during the 6-or-so-week-long season, including "Here's a pound of asparagus! And some hollandaise sauce! And some potatoes! Knock yourself out!" If you want something a bit more substantial, they'll sling a hundred grams of ham, or a schnitzel, onto the plate as well. It is heavenly.

So that's what we did to celebrate spring! What you need, for 2 greedy asparagus lovers:

2 bundles each, green and white asparagus (NB: white asparagus is tasty but hellishly expensive)
~100 g prosciutto cotto (NB: Or to your personal taste for ham. Any ham will do.)
500 g new/salad/small potatoes
butter
1 tsp sugar
salt
lemon juice
2 eggs
butter

ASPARAGUS: Wash the asparagus. Green asparagus just needs the woody bits at the end snapped off -- it will give easily where it starts to go woody. White asparagus is rather tougher: cut the woody ends off, and peel the entire stem from just below the tip. You can buy a gadget for this, but a veggie peeler works just as well.

Like this!

Put the asparagus into a sautepan that will fit it lying down, with the white asparagus on the bottom. (there is a gadget for this too!) Pour water into the pan so it partially covers the asparagus, then add a bit of butter, sugar, salt, and lemon juice. The time depends on the type and width of the spears -- white is about 15 minutes, green is maybe 5, so we just added the green partway through.

Like so.

POTATOES: Boil or steam to your favorite recipe.

HOLLANDAISE: We used Serious Eats' foolproof 2 minute recipe (with an extra egg yolk, I think, and less butter), but wound up putting it into a small saucepan and heating it some more. Of course, it then seized -- if this happens, take it off the heat, add an ice cube, and stir like mad to smooth it out.

I was so very much the heroine...

PLATING: If you feel like being fancy, roll up the ham. Add hollandaise to asparagus and/or potatoes to taste. Feel like royalty.

<drool>